Apathy

There is a real good song that has these lines:

What a beautiful piece of heartache
this has all turned out to be
Lord knows we've learned the hard way
all about healthy apathy.

I am hanging out in this healthy apathy place. Very bad, very queer, very strange things are afoot at the Circle-M.
I am concerned that I have no appetite for intimate relationship. Love is like dark chocolate. Makes you pucker and open wide all at the same time while slipping down your gullet with extraordinary ease, filling you up too fast because it's too rich and yet you still want more, more, more.
It is like I have eaten several slices of Max's Opera Cafe Triple Fantasy Chocolate Espresso Torte (ohthankyouJesus) and now I am sick. I am feeling that feeling - that oh so horrible feeling - dare I say it?
"If I never eat chocolate again, it will be too soon."

I guess the good part is that whenever you say something like that, you know you really will eat chocolate again, because the precise act that made you sick it the precise act that you crave again. I, for one, always want more chocolate.

But not today.